Make Your After-School AWESOME!
Upon picking up the kids from school, it is so natural for a parent to smile while asking, “How was your day?”. It is also typical for kids to groan, sink into their seats and answer the query with, “I don’t know”. The truth is that school can be super fun for kids, but it is also taxing. Learning is hard work! Plus, your child is also somehow supposed to have the energy to get ready for after-school activities, do their homework, maintain their social life and find time to chill?! It can feel like a lot sometimes. Here are some tips on creating a routine and making the most of the evenings after school days from a been-there-done-that parent.
Snack and Silence
If your kids are anything like mine, they are hangry after school. I know they are eating lunch, because I see their cafeteria balance drain down a ton each week! But still, the hunger of my growing boys is ravenous. It helps to have a healthy snack ready for them when they get home, and honestly, just give them maybe half an hour to decompress and not be bombarded with questions about their day. School takes energy and effort. Give your kiddo a moment to transition from student to their regular old self when they get home from school.
Visual Reminders
Keep a family calendar visible physically, or easily accessible digitally, so everyone knows which days have practices, games or other events. If everyone knows what the weekly itinerary consists of, it is easier to stay on task and be on time.
For parents with itty bitties, you can use a wall calendar with stickers or printed out images to create a visual planner. For readers who are gaining independence, you can communicate other tasks by slapping a post-it note somewhere they will see it like their bathroom mirror, place at the table, etc… “Get your gear ready this morning—we need to leave for practice at 5:45 tonight!”. “You have a test on Friday, study at least 15 minutes tonight!”
Set that Alarm
Along with visual reminders, audible reminders are a great way to stay organized and be prepared. If you constantly are running late because you have to go on a hunt to find the forever missing left cleat, accept it and simply set your alarm earlier. Life is messy. There is no shame in that. But if you are consistently running late all the time, own up to being a conductor of the hot mess express (CHOO CHOO! It’s me!) and go ahead and allot yourself more time to get ready. Young ones may benefit from having a small countdown timer with a buzzer–even kids who don’t know their numbers yet can gain an understanding of this visual and audial reminder. They can easily start to understand what fifteen minutes feels like if you say “We are leaving in 15 minutes”, and start their little countdown clock.
If your child is a bit older and has their own phone, work on setting them up for success and discuss what recurring alarms would be helpful for them to set. You can even make it fun by having music they like as their alarm.
Find Balance
Have a heart to heart with the fam and choose how much is enough and how much is too much when it comes to after school activities and socialization. Set clear boundaries on how often and when they can have play dates/hang out sessions with their buddies. If communication is clear, kids tend to understand and be okay with guidelines… especially if they feel like they were a part of the decision-making process.
Make Time for Family
Whether you choose to have sit down dinners with the family every single night, embark on weekly game nights or indulge in family date night once a month, consistency is key! Prioritize inner-family relationships and time spent with individual kiddos, too. Having a good family foundation with flourishing relationships makes for smooth sailing when it comes to tough times. Life definitely gets hectic, so choose the frequency that’s right for your fam and stick to it. Even the busiest family can get creative with routine together time. Driving here and there can become a special time, even! Work with your kiddo to create their own car time playlist during carpools to practice! One of my kids even really loved listening to old episodes of “Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader” with me on longer car rides to team events he had.
Homework: Know the Expectation
Every kid is different. Some prefer to do their homework right after school and get it out of the way. Others prefer to do their homework after whatever activity they have that day. Some even prefer to wake up early and do their homework in the morning, before school! Chat with your kiddo and decide when they do their best work, designate a homework space, make sure homework time is distraction (and device) free, and make sure to stay consistent.
Bedtime Chats
Here is a very sneaky tip… I feel like kids like to talk before bed, because they feel like they are getting to stay up later. If your child has a known bedtime, pop into their room about 10-15 minutes beforehand and ask about their day. If your kid gets to “stay up” five minutes past bedtime because you get into a deep conversation… *gasp* oh no! They think they are pulling one over on you, but really you are just getting to know your child more and giving them a safe place to dump all of their feelings and thoughts about their day before the drift to sleep.
With a little bit of planning, lots of pre-meditated snacks and alarms galore, your after school evenings are sure to run a smidge smoother. Give yourself, and your kids, lots of grace and remember: you are all on the same team!
