Happiness is a state of mind. There are simple steps you can take to get there.

Want your children to be happy? Christine Carter, sociologist and author of Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents can tell you a thing or two about it. Here are 8 secrets to raising happy kids:

1. Put on your own oxygen mask first.
Meet your needs first, then meet those of your children.

2. Build connections.
Happy people tend to have stronger social relationships than less happy people. Model kindness and practice mindfulness.

3. Expect effort and enjoyment, not perfection
Help kids see that mistakes are fertile ground for growth. Deal with challenges by realizing mistakes help us to learn.

4. Choose gratitude, forgiveness and optimism
Keep a list of things you are grateful for and add to it daily.

5. Raise your emotional IQ
Teach kids to read and understand the emotions of others.

6. Practice encouragement, empathy and non-controlling language

7. Enjoy the moments
Tune in to what’s happening now as opposed to what’s in the past or future.

8. Rig the world for happiness.
Make sure kids have plenty of time for play. Be affectionate with them. Encourage warm friends and opportunities for togetherness.